Irrational female weirdness!

I don't know what's wrong with me sometimes? Well, I do...I'm female!



My husband and i were supposed to go on holiday for two weeks in portuagal. My regular readers will know i am completely agoraphobic. So when the time came near to go, i freaked out and decided i was going nowhere. The thought of not being able to get home for two whole weeks terrifies me! Fortunately, there were others joining us on our hols, and i gladly announced to my other half;



" no darling OF COURSE i don't mind you going without me...i'll be fine on my own!"



NEWS FLASH: I am not fine, not fine at all! I'm miserable, and scared, and pregnant!



Seriously...what the heck is going on with me? Eight years ago i lived on the streets for a couple of months, now i am falling apart and becoming a gibbering wreck in the comfort of my marital home. Marriage has turned me into a big baby!



Anyway, the point is this: I was glad to have him go without me, in fact i was relieved to be off the hook about it, and now? Now i'm just mad he damn well left me in the first place! How dare he go off enjoying himself, leaving me alone and miserable. HE JUST LEFT! HOW COULD HE LEAVE ME LIKE THAT?? See....angry! Completely irrational



*Sigh 11 days to go.



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How to use setting in your writing?

Setting is a major consideration and powerful tool in fiction writing. However, it is not just fiction writing that a good setting can be useful, but also can be used to bring a blog to life. Travel bloggers can use setting to entice their readers into really feeling the culture of a place, the architecture, and landscape. Used appropriately a setting can really make any type of blog post "pop", making your writing stand out from the millions of other blogs out there.

Setting means a certain place at a certain time, a stage. When and where does your story take place? Show us that place? For example...Waterloo railway station, on a crisp winter morning at 7.00am. Give details of the surroundings. The commuters arriving for work, smartly dressed men in suits with shiny black briefcases. Their early morning sighs, creating puffs of frosty breath that dissipates into the crisp winter air. The morning stillness is broken by the boom of a nasal voice announcing the approaching train. You see, we are ready to visualise the action now that we have a stage.

Although saying that, be careful of too much detail as it can become really boring and long winded, and readers often skip passages to get to the action. When descriptions of a place drag, the problem is usually not with the setting, but in presenting it too slowly. Make your descriptions dynamic and quick. Imagine you are watching a film. You wouldn't see half an hour of scenery before meeting the actors. So when you show your setting, give only a few details that will evoke a place. If the details are vivid, the reader will create a picture in their imagination.

When you write an article you ask " who, what, when, where, how and why?" when creating a story, ask "where, and when?" That is your setting!

If you are interested in a more detailed article about settings, just email me at meami_5@live.com

What would you like to see this week?

Hi guys. Just a quick post to ask what you would like a post on in the next few days, id really like to know what would be more useful to you?



A) Blogging tips.

B) Creative writing advice.

C) Other (please let me know eg. humour, life, finance, relationships etc.



Looking forward to hearing from you.

Emma xx



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10 Sneaky ways to get your man to do what you want!

This post is only for fun and should be taken with a pinch of salt.

  
1. Stand in front of the TV when he's playing his x box, and refuse to move until he agrees with you.

2. Tell him your ex wo7uld have done it. Their ego's can't resist this one.

3. Top tip : Most men will agree to anything just before or in the minutes after sex. ;)

4. Ask him at 4.00am, he'll probably tell you "yes" to get you to go back to sleep.

5. Tell him he can either take you dancing/pictures/beach/bowling/pub, or he can babysit while your slightly wild, single friend takes you.

6. If you want him to spend more time with you, sell his game station while he's out, and tell him you were burgled. Not only will you get his full attention, but you will have extra cash for the electric bill that needs paying!

7. Tell his mum. She'll be so concerned you might split up and he will have to move back home with her, she will have him agreeing to your demands in no time!

8. Tell your mum....the disapproving glances she gives him will have him treating you like a queen, while still thinking it was his idea!

9. Have your best mate come round and loudly announce the hot guy from your fav coffee shop, asked for your number. Him thinking he has competition will jump start the romantic gesture's before you can say " cappachino please."

10. If you have got this far and suggestions 1-9 haven't worked.....you probably need a new man, as this one has no pulse! ;)

Improve your writing talent.

Do you want to improve your writing without spending  a fortune on creative writing courses?

Do you struggle making your characters realistic? Is your dialogue stilted? Or maybe like me, you have trouble writing with point of view? Maybe you just want to make your blog posts 'pop'!

Wether you are an amateur, proffesional writer, or a keen blogger, we can all do with sharpening our creative skills. So, here are a few products to help you become the writer you want to be.

• 1st creative writing course - Learn how to write non fiction, best selling books. - Click Here! - $20.76 
• More writers first aid ; getting the writing done - Award winning childrens author Kristy Holl, encourages aspiring writers, plus gives practical help with page turning ficton. -   Click Here!
• Six ways to turn your good writing into great writing. - Helping all writers bring their writing to a higher level. -  Click Here! - $8.73
• Polish and publish - the indispensable toolkit for creative writers. - Start or accelerate your creative writing career, so you can be successful doing what you love the most- writing! This e book will tell you everything you need to know to start and continue writing. - Click Here! - $0.00
• How to make money writing easy 350-500 word web articles - 
  If you can type, you can start making money writing simple 350-500 word web articles. You don't need experience. In fact, most who start don't have any. I'll tell you everything you need to get started immediately. I do it every day & so can you! - Click Here! - $17.98
• Effective writing made simple - All you need to know about good writing. Grammer, sentance style, choice of words, paragraph development etc. -  Click Here! - $3.02
• How to write a book the easy way. - Writing a book has never been easier. Learn how to write a book from the beginning. - Click Here! - $0.00
• How to write your own e book in 7 days! - Write and publish your own outrageosly profitable e book in as little as 7 days, even if you can't write or type. - Click Here! - $12.85
• Writers resource guide to online writing for money. - Learn how to substitute or supplement your monthly income writing articles for money. This e book contains tips, tricks, and information on many of the most popular article submission sites, that will pay you to submit articles. - Click Here! - $0.00
• Write, create, and promote a best seller.- Learn what publishers want, and profit from your writing. - Click Here! - $5.48
• 101 ways to power up your writing. - Writing tips and advice from a fortune 500 writer. Prevent embarressing english mistakes. Write with power and impact. - Click Here! - $12.57

How to make money from your blog - part 3.

# A beginners post

Many new bloggers search the Internet every day to find specific ways to make money blogging, and find it very difficult to find definitive methods of making money from a blog. I have put together this post to give you the three sure fire ways to get a decent income from your blog, and how these methods work for the bloggers using them.

• Advertising
• Affiliate marketing
• Selling products and services.

Advertising

Use google adsense to place advertisements on your blog, at adsense Google will provide adverts relating to topics covered on your blog, and you will be paid for every reader that clicks on an advert. You can also advertise space on your blog. ( advertisers pay to rent space on your blog for their adverts. ) You can find companies that offer this service by doing a quick Internet search, by typing "ad space for rent." Or something similar.

Affiliate marketing.

Sign up for a free account at clickbank. Find products that interest you and relate to your blog, and promote and/or sell them in your posts. Amazon also has a great affiliate program at Amazonassociates They also do most of the work for you, picking products that relate to your blog, allowing shoppers to buy straight from you. If you would like to sell certain products relating to your niche, use amazon product finder to handpick the goods you want to sell.

Selling products and services.

• Create your own product, such as an e book, audio or video dvds, or a home study course and sell them from your blog.
• Host your own workshop or seminar, and sell tickets to it on your blog.
• Record the seminar or workshop, and then sell the dvd on your blog.
• provide consulting or coaching services ( this works best when you have a niche or "how to " blog.) by the hour.
• If you have a niche blog, eg. A blog about make up tips. Try adding a shopping cart to your blog and sell make up or skin creams.

 Once these methods are implemented and your blog is running smoothly and you are posting regularly, this can lead to other options that can indirectly earn you money from blogging.

• Invitations to guest blog.
• Invitations to speak at conferences and seminars.
• Opportunity to write and publish a book ( which can then be publicized and sold on your blog.)
• Free products to sample and review.
• The chance to establish yourself as an expert in your chosen subject.

An example of a blogger who began by implementing these techniques, is Frances Kerr. Her income ranges from $4000 - $8000 a month, with a niche blog on alternative health and skin care.
       She began making money with adsense, then by selling banners to sponsors, and from there reviewing affiliate products like e books and dvds. After 18 months of this, she wrote her first e book on acne treatment , which resulted in a steady income stream continued to this day. Next she launched her own online store and began selling skin care creams. This led to private consulting for an hourly fee.
      Take a look at this podcast, to find out how she built her business in detail, with some great tips to get you started.

This months blogging

As of monday im back baby!! Broadband will be installed on monday so my laptop is finally in operation again!!

The very miserable blogging hiatus is over, so bear with me my lovely followers, this month i will bombard you with some great blogging and creative writing tips, punctuated by some lighthearted banter, and some new short stories.

Please let me know if there is any topic you would particularly find useful, and it shall be done! :)

Heres to a productive month all round!

Emma xxx



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The only way is essex stars sam and Mark on secret holiday together?

mark wright

"ToWIE" stars Samantha Faiers and Mark Wright, were last seen on our screens heading off in a taxi together to share a romantic tryst. Two days ago they both jetted off on a mini break, although Sam claims in her recent tweets she is holidaying with co star Harry Derbridge.



When asked by a fan on twitter if she was going with Mark, she claimed;



"no Harry!"



Sam tweets;



From: @SamanthaFaiers

Sent: 8 Jan 2011 04:01



On the way to the airport !! :-) bye Essex!



Coincidentally, Mark tweets;



From: @MarkWright_

Sent: 7 Jan 2011 23:10



9 hour flight 1st class, lagging not a cloud in the sky i can feel 1 amazing trip. C u soon england



On the same morning, funny that? (note the time on their tweets?)



While Mark poses for the above photo, alone. Sam`s photos are also curiously devoid of a travelling companion;



From: @SamanthaFaiers

Sent: 10 Jan 2011 10:05



Wow sunset and my sunbathing view ! Xx Jel? http://yfrog.com/h668srj



Something has clearly put a smile on Mark`s face, as he tweets from his holiday location ;



From: @MarkWright_

Sent: 9 Jan 2011 03:50



Il make you feel your "the only girl in the world "



From: @MarkWright_

Sent: 8 Jan 2011 02:28



Omg im in the best place in the world living the dream The sky is the limit i loive once so fuck it !! Never look bk out wiv old in wiv new



"Out with the old, in with the new." Oh yes, what or who could he possibly referring to...hmm? ;)



So just remember when the truth comes out, you heard it here first! :)



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Twitter community outraged at the pro anorexia comments of Kenneth Tong, ( past big brother contestant )

The whole twitter community is up in arms, fuelled by the constant tweets of a Mr Kenneth Tong, promoting the size 0 trend and what he calls "managed anorexia" and becoming a size zero by cutting out food altogether.

sending out tweets such as;

From: @MrKennethTong
Sent: 7 Jan 2011 6:23pm

"Sacrifice is giving up something good for something better. Food is good, thin is better. Think about this before your Dinner..."

He also claims to have invented a size Zero pill, that according to his tweets, he will be testing on ten of his followers, selected by a photo and a brief statement as to how the pill would change their lives.

Worryingly enough, his ghastly, ill informed message with tweets such as ;

"Managed anorexia is not life threatening, it gives living another chance after you messed it up eating too much."

This is the kind of sickening message that is now trending worldwide on the twitter network, encouraging young girls to starve themselves. Even manipulating them with their favourite celebrities!

"Inner beauty is as convincing of an argument and idea as @JustinBieber dating a fat girl. We all know she'll be skinny and size zero."

Even more disturbing is the fact he seems to have young girls under a sort of size zero mentor ship.

From: @MrKennethTong
Sent: 7 Jan 2011 1:17pm

"@Shaunna_D Just checking in on how your weight loss & dieting is, your my youngest dieter. Don't let the fat oppress, they're just jealous."

From: @MrKennethTong
Sent: 6 Jan 2011 8:34am

"Girl I've been thinspiration to slept with Drake last night, had she not been size zero: no chance." http://twitpic.com/3ngnap

How can this be allowed to continue, and when will twitter take notice and remove him? His warped comments are causing young girls to actually begin the process of starving themselves!


"RT @shannafraser: @MrKennethTong Iv Lost 3 Pounds in 4 days thanks to you Kenneth I needed to realis that thin is fashion and you cant hide behind curvy thnx"

Comments made to Kenneth Tong by celebrity personalities such as Simon Cowell, rhianna and many more outraged by his comments, are only serving to encourage his behaviour;

From: @MrKennethTong
Sent: 8 Jan 2011 11:35am

"RT @RochelleTheSats: @MrKennethTong Your tweets are upsetting a lot of people, including myself! It's very vile! Twitter isn't meant for people like you!!"

As he gleefully retweets this plea to stop from Rochelle the Saturdays, arrogantly replying;

From: @MrKennethTong
Sent: 8 Jan 2011 11:41am

"@RochelleTheSats I'm a fan of rhetorical questions so I pose you this: if you were fat do you think would you've been part of the Saturdays?"

His shameless use of celebrity has began to take a worrying turn however, as he hints that Gordon Ramsey, endorses his size zero message;

From: @MrKennethTong
Sent: 7 Jan 2011 5:37pm

http://twitpic.com/3bss54 - "Have reached out to @GordonRamsay01 to assist in promoting my size zero campaign... Picture of us together."

The whole debate looks set to run and run. Although if twitter were just to delete his account, this attention seeker would loose his platform from which to influence these vulnerable young women, and this man would be forced to crawl back under his rock! As actor David Shneider wisely suggests, tweeting;

From: @davidschneider
Sent: 8 Jan 2011 9:29am

"I have unfollowed Kenneth Tong. The only way to make him see the error of his ways is to reduce his follower count to size zero."

If you have young women in your family, beware of what they are reading on twitter. Please help stop this man influencing any other young minds. Did this post inspire a reaction in you? If so, please shout it out here, and comment.

I have asked Mr Tong for a quote before publishing this. As of yet, no reply. I also asked for a quote on claims he is just fame hungry and a celeb wannabe. As of yet, no reply ;)


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